Finding your voice

For those of you who don’t know me, my voice is extremely important. Because I’m deaf, my mom pushed me to learn how to be verbal to communicate. It’s not a bad thing, in fact, I use it to utilize my ability to communicate when others may not be able to. It’s truly a blessing. 

In the past few weeks, I have been trying to understand how to use my voice, not just practically but also how it can be used to proclaim God’s glory. Like singing, I actually love singing, though most people may not realize it. At some point in my life, I went through three karaoke machines trying to self-teach. Because Arizona is so dry, I needed a humidifier in my room and it’s what destroyed them. I always thought I had a high pitch voice when I would hear the recordings and only sounded better when I’m sick. But someone overheard me singing recently and asked if I had voice lessons and said, “nope, though I wish!” I’ll take a compliment about someone thinking I’m getting voice lessons any day. 

But the reality is, my voice can also be used to share my testimony. I do have countless testimonies. Some stories people may not believe unless they were there or a simple breakthrough. 

For example: During Holy Spirit week, we did discuss about healing. The teacher used ministry night to encourage all students and staff to pray for healing for other students in the room. I stood up and said I had pain in my elbow and knee from a bike accident last August. When nothing happened the first time, or the second time, they kept praying. I started to feel temporary relief in my knee. But nothing was happening with my elbow. After the fifth time, I felt heat on it and they prayed again! They took a look at it and noticed my scar began to fade. It was originally very red/purple and also grew smaller. 

I almost fell to my knees when I realized healing wasn’t just a rumor or someone I hear about. It happened in front of my own eyes. I do know that a few months ago, the doctors said I no longer had to take medication for my seizures due to the medication triggering the seizures. But it doesn’t mean I’ve been completely healed, it simply means I recognize something my body didn’t need. They are mainly triggered by an illness or exhaustion. 

Trusting God in times of healing and not relying on sight can change your perspective. But when it comes to your voice, you have a say. A choice. You can step back and not say anything at all or you can chose to step out and burst the bubble.

This is one of my biggest struggle. My entire life, people were either fighting over something or saying my voice was too soft and give me the “never mind” message. I honestly long to be a part of a conversation, voicing ideas or thoughts. And more so, sharing my testimony of my life and how God is changing me. But first, I must trust the Holy Spirit with my voice. Lead me in the right direction of what to say, how to say it and when. It’s a work in progress the Holy Spirit has been leading me in. But I know, sooner or later as we start out outreach phase, I will be confident and using my voice in ways you wouldn’t even expect. Perhaps not even myself.

I dare you to use your voice and speak, just maybe; your voice can bring God’s heavenly Kingdom on earth when another life is celebrated.

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